How do you deal with difficult people.?

14 Jul

How do you deal with difficult people.?

Author: admin | Category: dealing with difficult people

I don’t know how to assert myself around difficult people without becoming verbally aggressive at some point. I am a nice person, a team player and hard working. Some people mistake my niceness for weakness. And when you are nice those type of people get the idea that thier little games are working so they continue. I have zero tolerance for irrational people and at some point I will let them know even if it’s a boss. Nicely at first but after a while I lose my patience. I just don’t seem to care at the time. It’s a life problem I’ve been struggling with and I don’t see any solution but to quit. I’m tried of running from these people and there seems to be one anywhere you go. I’ve told two bosses off in a period of 5 years. Is this normal? Trust me this was after doing whatever I could to appease and accomadate them. I finally told them off. I feel like when I’m being nice and diplomatic about things I’m constantly getting disrespected by people like that.
These jobs that I’ve had were informal setting. It’s like you get to know these people like family.
One instance, this boss was constantly critcizing any minor thing I did wrong but lightly recognizing my strong qualities. His partner had an ‘if you don’t like it we’ll get a replacement’ attitude. I knew for sure I was one of their best employees.
I couldn’t take it anymore and, after another one of his confrontations, in a fit of anger i told him how I felt about both of them. How do you deal with these people?

See More Related Blogs

Share and Enjoy:

Technorati Tags: anger, attitude, boss, Confrontations, jobs, little games, niceness, patience, team player, zero tolerance

Tags: anger, attitude, boss, Confrontations, jobs, little games, niceness, patience, team player, zero tolerance

3 Responses to “How do you deal with difficult people.?”

MissMazie Says:
July 14th, 2010 at 4:38 am
For starters you repeat back the unreasonable request, using their name, in a calm manner. For instance : John, are you saying there is nothing you can salvage from the 8 hours of work I did on Friday? He may back down when he hears how unreasonable his words were. It isn’t easy to come face to face with a steam engine. If the pay was over the top, I would suck it up and ignore the bully. Do your 8 hrs and go home and forget about it. If it gets to the point of harassment, find work elsewhere.
lkl Says:
July 14th, 2010 at 4:38 am
When I was about 25 I had those kinds of troubles, after I got a career I found it much more professional and valued my job and wouldn’t dare jeopordize it cause you need the references to put down. I’d quit without a argument if it gets that bad. Just keep finding your niche in life and you’ll be okay and you’ll mellow with age.
Angie Kelso Says:
July 14th, 2010 at 4:38 am
I have the exact same problem.

It’s easier now for me since I am retired. So no bosses to HAVE to watch myself and what I say.
And… for many years, I had my own businesses so, again no bosses.
When I worked for companies, well, I ran into the same kinds of problems as you describe. I never did get good at it back then. But what you might want to do is first calm down before you speak. Then ..perhaps go home and think carefully what you want to say. You can meet with this person privately afterwards and discuss this. They might respect you some more and not be so quick at their verbal attacks again.

Some people are just nasty though because they are insecure or just mean people. So it just doesn’t matter what you say or do. If it gets too much, you need to find yourself a new place to work.

I now am very careful with the kinds of people I surround myself with. You will always have a few nasty people you run into, but then you just load yourself up with a few comeback lines. I like to tell really nasty people: Did you forget to take your medication today?

Coping With Difficult People